Breaking it down, Xmas edition

In the popular holiday song "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town" it's pretty easy to see how opening with "You'd better watch out" and later a line like "He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake" could be somewhat creepy, with Big Brother-esque overtones. However, the closing of that couplet that ostensibly softens the potential for paranoia—"He knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness' sake"—is completely undone by that first part. The assertion that he has you under constant surveillance renders the potential for "being good for goodness' sake" impossible; any good done is not performed for its own sake but in order to avoid making the sort of mistake that Santa's purportedly ubiquitous gaze would get you on the "naughty" list. Any otherwise altruistic gesture becomes selfish because, at least on a subconscious level, it's done to avoid the negative consequences associated therewith.

And what sort of error in behavior could bring one to that disgraceful status? According to the opening stanza, crying alone is sufficient ("you'd better not cry"). Sure, the next part alludes to pouting, but as that's mentioned separately crying becomes its own item on the list, independent of any connection with pouting. So if you're sad you'd better just suck it up because only stoicism gets one on the "nice" list.

If anyone actually paid attention to and followed the words of the song he'd be emotionally stunted and generally distressed about Christmas. He might find himself unwittingly compelled to deconstruct the lyrics in a manner not unlike this. And who'd want that?

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Speaking of holiday song lyrics that just slide by, what about this one from "Winter Wonderland": "We'll have lots of fun with Mr. Snowman until the other kiddies knock him down" (emphasis mine). It is simply taken as a given that the joy brought about by putting all the effort into making a snowman and having whatever constitutes "lots of fun" with it shall be brought to an end by uninvolved children who seek destruction out of what seems merely mischievous but almost certainly suggests deeper psychological issues—ones that really should be glossed over so glibly, even if "down" is a convenient rhyme for "clown" (which pretense in that prior line takes the snowman to be).

Kids may be kids, but to take down a snow sculpture—even an amateur one—with such wanton disregard for others is not something to be tacitly encouraged in popular song.

The kids are already paranoid from Santa watching them; we needn't be turning them into delinquents as well.

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No, "Winter Wonderland" makes no overt reference to Xmas or any other holiday, but really, when else do you hear it? It's a "holiday" song by association if not intention.


And it really has no application to areas like Southern California where there's little potential to make snowmen. Perhaps a sculpture in the style of a sand castle, but not actual snow.


Of course, the sunshine has enough songs about it; that the snowy landscape of winter gets one is only fair, even if it is just trying to romanticize the bleakest season.

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Heck, the reason Xmas (the capitalistic appropriation of Christmas) is as big as it is probably stems from being in winter. Sure, the marketing possibilities are attractive, but one could concoct a holiday that takes advantage of consumerism and put it in any month and get a decent level of involvement. To have it really take off, one needs to have it take place at a time of year when the darkness exceeds the light, when cold reigns, when people are forced to pretend that getting bundled up is fun.


Had it started in the southern hemisphere, during their winter, and then fallen in the northern hemisphere's summer I see little chance it would have the same popularity amongst those above the equator. Not that it would have no following, but it would be on par with, say, the U.S.'s 4th of July, or perhaps Halloween—good, but not something that people anticipate for a month beforehand.


People don't need a respite from long, sunny days in the same way that they do from gray, snowy days. Sure, sweltering summer heat can suck just as much as freezing winter cold, but it's never so hot that they close schools (much to the chagrin of children who may have to attend classes during those days).


And imagine the Christmas carols that would come from that.  Bah humbug.

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Merry Christmas, or Merry Xmas, or just happy Friday tomorrow.