Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Reason #5 to avoid Spike TV, which shows the Star Wars franchise almost on a loop

Watching the Endor battle scenes of Return of the Jedi, where the stormtroopers are trumped by the ewoks, still tests my ability to suspend disbelief even after all these years.

Really, one should just skip every forest sequence and stick to the space dogfights (including the part where Admiral Akbar says "It's a trap!")—unless, of course, one has made a drinking game out of watching the stormtroopers (replete with their armor and blasters) flail each time the little costumed actors put them down with nothing but rocks and sticks.

Friends don't let friends Endor and drive.


  1. I lost interest with "Luke, I am your father." By the time the Ewoks showed up, it was clear that the Star Wars movies were just a marketing tool for toys. I found it enraging. But really, look at the bulk of Lucas' work. With the exception of the Raiders of the Lost Ark movies, and the first Star Wars movie, his work has really stunk. "Labyrinthm," "Howard the Duck," "Willow".... they were all stinkers. He's made his fortune milking the Star Wars cow to death and selling toys. Which is capitalism, that's fine, but he deserves no real respect as a writer or a director, just because he had one home run.

  2. Not a fan of American Graffiti, eh? That one didn't have very good action figures.

    Star Wars popularity boils down to two simple things: light sabers and the Millennium Falcon.

    That's why the prequels aren't as good (by relative standards)--only one of those.

  3. Hey, the symbolism, man. The Ewoks were like the VC and the Storm Troopers were the American forces. The VC had primitive weapons and they still kicked US butt, even though the US had the superior tech. Not that Vietnam would ever repeat itself in Afghanistan or Iraq or Libya...

  4. BTW, how did Spike Lee's lawsuit against Spike TV work out? Maybe Spike Jones should also sue.


So, what do you think?